Thursday, June 11, 2009

KeZley part 2...

It became immediately clear uppon arrivein in Ecuador that Kelsey is not a very common name here. Not only that, but also that nearly all spanish speakers across the board, regardless of whether they are indigenous folk from ecuador or bilingual tango show hostesses in Buenos Aires, can not for the life of them pronounce her name. Her family lovingly referred to her as kesley (pronounced kezley, like elvis presley) the entire semester, the customs men at the post office in ecuador laughed bluntly in her faced and asked if that was seriously her name, but the icing on the cake occurred last night at our tango show.

So last night, we attended our first tango show in Buenos Aires after it was recommended to us by a New Zealandish...New Zealander...New Zealandian??...New Zealandic!!! comrad at our Hostel. He RAVED about the show, telling us they were ¨like, real professionals¨(pronounced profishonells) and that it was the best steak he had in all of Buenos aires, and the Tango musicians and singers were just.... FANTASTIC!!! We took his word for it and were presented with something between a strip show and the dance fighting scenes from West Side STory...the whole time i whistled ¨when you´re a jet you´re a jet all the way¨ in kelsey´s ear. Speaking of Kelsey....

So, in order to schedule the tango show kelsey called to make a reservation... now in her words a recounting of what happened:

¨i call the place, talk to the lady, get the information and hang up.
then nik is like, she told you the wrong time, call back and make sure its right.

okay, i´lll call back.

i call back and the lady is like OH GOOD i forgot to tell you about this promotion with your hostel, you get the whole meal for 180 pesos (originally we were just going to get drinks and desserrt) so i´m like COOLIO that´ll work just fine. and she´s like can you tell me your name again? and so we go through the whole process of trying to get her to understand that KELSEY is a NAME. but like everyone else in latin america, she doesn´t believe it for a second. so then i get off the phone, and am fairly confident that she has an idea of what my name is and that we do in fact have reservations.

but then nikki still isn´t convinced that the time the lady told me was right. so i call back AGAIN. in like a five minute period. but it is a good thing i call back because the lady is like OH GOOD YOU CALLED BACK AGAIN. i forgot to get your full name. (which was her way of saying, i still have no freakin clue what the hell your name is. why isn´t your name REAL??)

so i start to tell her my last name is stewart. and she´s like how do you spell it, and i´say S-T-E- and she´s like no your first name. so i change to K-E and nik is like NO THE NEXT LETTER IS W!!! hahahaha. but finally i spell it out, k-e-l-s AS IN SUSIE...etc. etc.

a few hours later we finally arrive and go to check in, and what is my name written down as on the reservation??



Also, another quick and trivial happening that just occurred. We were just taking the elvator down in our Hostel to head over to this internet cafe and when we stepped aboard the 60 year old door man of the hostel was standing in the elevator car. I walked in, the doors closed, and immediately i had the sensation i was being suffocated. Initially confused, i quickly realized the waning oxygen was the result of a growing abundance of cigarette smoking filling the elevator and sneaking up my virgin nostrils. hahahaha. Anyway, i look furtively using my peripherals and see the door man holding a marlboro, sucking on it idiotically with his old chapped lips. Horrified i instantly started shooting dagger eyes of death at kelsey and then down at the cigaretted hand. She began to laugh. Then the man dropped his cigarette after hot boxing the ´vator and put it out on the ground. Then i burst out laughing until i realized i shouldn´t waste what little oxygen i had left.... Moral of the story, WHO THE HELL SMOKES A CIGARETTE IN AN ELEVATOR.. A SMALL ENCLOSED METAL BOX. WHO FREAKING DOES THAT?? IS IT EVEN LEGAL? I´m inclined to complain and say what the hell is wrong with the whole rest of the world why do they all smoke, but i realize the real problem is the GODDAMN TOBACCO INDUSTRY...YOU FUCKERS HOT BOXED MY ELEVATOR IN BUENOS AIRES. TAX THOSE CIGARRETTES, TAX ÉM ALL DAY CONGRESS!!!

ok ok we´re getting a little loopy down here. Tonight or tomorrow night we´re trying to go to this greek restaurant where they break plates and stuff. i´m hoping for a rousing rendition of mizerlou on the bizouki!



  1. hahahahaha i wonder how they would have reacted to my name!

    i could totally see you doing that little rant at the end nikki...glad things haven't changed too much :)

    also, i'm going to e-mail you in like a hot minute...RESPOND. okay, obviously, you don't have to buttttt i just want to see what your schedule is like...aka when i can sprint and hug the two of you!!!!


  2. JAJAJAJJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJAJA (that is my spelling of laughter en espanol)

    that story is perfect. i love you, kelfly and nik.

    also, nikki, do you remember WAY back at the beginning of Freshman year when we all went to a party at the graduate and got in a crowded elevator with like 2983 people and a mean blonde whore woman lit up a cigarette and you turned to me and said "It's a REALLY smart Idea to wait until you get into a closed space with dozens of people and THEN light up a cigarette"

    and the girl goes " who are you? freshman? thought so!" and blew smoke at us...

    and then nikki had a few choice words for the girl, which should not be repeated near virgnial ears (like virginal nostrils)

    and i thought "i LOVE this girl"

    anyway, stay safe you two. see you SOON


  3. Hahahaha, awesome. I miss being abroad. TREASURE THOSE MOMENTS, even the elevator ones. Because the USA is kind of boring. Nice weather right now though!

    Also, new zealand people = kiwis.